Providing Today's Entertainment

Well, we did it again.  Mom and I single-handily entertained everyone we encountered today.

It started innocently enough: I needed new glasses.  After church, we went to the mall and meandered towards the eye doctor's office.  Well, they didn't have any appointments until 2:15, so we ventured into the mall.  An hour and half later, we returned.

It was the same ole spiel.  "Can you read these letters?  What numbers are in dots?" I almost have that book memorized.  "Take your contacts out.  Now can you read the letters?  This puff if your eye is going to make you jump but it won't hurt.  Have a seat right here.  The doctor will see you shortly."

So there we sat.  Me half blind; Mom laughing at me.

The doctor came out and called my sister's name.  I almost, automatically, stood and corrected him.  People confuse my for my sister all of the time.  But there was another patient standing, so Mom and I just laughed.

Then he came back and asked for someone with my dad's name.  "Actually, this is Katie," Mom whispered to me.  We had another good laugh.

I've been going to this same place in the mall for years, but this was a new doctor I'd never met before.  You figure if he was working Sunday afternoon he probably wasn't very high on the totem pole.  However, every time he came back, we noticed he had a smile.  Well, Mom noticed. I just saw him as a big purple and black blob, but I think we have matching purple shirts.  We figured he was enjoying his job.

Finally, the doctor came out and called my name.  With a hand outstretched, he introduced himself.

"I can't see you," I said with a laugh.  He chuckled, I found his hand, and we shook. 

Then he led me back to the exam room.  "Just feel around until you find the big chair," he said.  My turn to laugh.  I'm not quite that blind. 

The exam went well, albeit not uneventful.
Doctor: Healthy blood flow.
Katie: Oh, good.
Doctor: No signs of glaucoma.
Katie: Oh, good.
Doctor: Your prescription needs to be updated but all looks good.
Katie: Oooh, yay!
He laughed.

To do: Entertain Opthamologist.  Check

Next on the to-do list was the more daunting task of picking out new glasses.  I narrowed it down to two but could not decide between them. 

Number one...
or
number two...

Finally, I put them both on at the same time to compare the two.  Well, someone saw me with two pairs of glasses on (and contacts back in by this point) and just started laughing.

To do: Entertain other patients.  Check.

The last thing we had to do was check out.  The store was super busy that day, so by this point Mom and I had been there for over an hour (not including the almost two hours we stalled prior to my appointment).  We were ready to go home.  Meaning we were more giggly, if that's possible.

Just in case the conversation between Mom and I wasn't enough to entertain the clerk, we threw her some jokes, too.  Most of which I don't remember.  I do remember she had a sheepish laugh when I told her I loved how her glasses matched her shirt.

To do: Entertain sales clerk.  Check.

Then she handed us the bill, and I was thoroughly confused: why were we paying to be their comic relief on a Sunday afternoon?

<>< Katie

"Keep on loving each other as brothers. Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some people have entertained angels without knowing it." Hebrews 13:1-2

Thoughts from the Bathroom

After six exams, eight hours of packing, and a 13 hour drive I am home for the summer! This means time to re-establish home life with the family. One of our biggest places of contention is the bathroom. It makes sense: I have two sisters. It's also why my parents put two sinks in our bathroom when we built the house. When I'm at school it works well: two girls, two sinks. When I come home, the drama begins as we re-establish the pecking order, I mean bathroom organization.

When it comes to bathroom time, I'm pretty low maintenance: brush my tooth, pop in the contacts, lotion, comb the now-short hair, done. My sisters...not so much. I asked Dad to "handle the situation upstairs," and he didn't know what I was talking about until I showed him our bathroom. I then went to find a shovel to help him get his chin off of the floor. He went downstairs and told my sisters to get some of their "crap" off the counter.

"What crap?" my sisters responded innocently.

"Make-up, bottles, cords, I don't know... girl stuff."

It was their turn to use the shovel. I also think the stuff was levitating because there was no counter visible. The shower was just as bad. Between the two of them there were: fourteen bottles, four loofas, and three razors. I just don't understand.

After they moved their "crap" (and I evicted Mom's "overgrown toothbrush mold" of a decor) I was able to move-in. I opened my drawer and found four open bottles of contact solution. I practically drink the stuff, so I don't have any idea how I managed to get four open bottles (one from home, one from school, one from Dad, and one from some trip? I don't really know), but I do know I won't be needing to buy anymore this week. No promises on next week, though. As I was sorting through the surplus of hotel lotion, unused orthodontia rubber bands, and old contacts God got my attention.

Every August I get new contacts whether I need them or not. Most years it's a not. This means I have an ever-growing stack of out-dated, old prescription contacts that I don't know what to do with. Every August Mom tells me to keep wearing the old contacts to use them up and start the new ones in September. It's a great plan since "your eyes will never be closer to what they were than they are right now" (does that make sense?). Besides, normally I don't know how bad my prescription is until I get the new one. Flaw in the plan: when you go to the eye doctor they fit you for new contacts and you have to prove you know how to put them in. I've been wearing contacts everyday for the last six years, but sure you can teach me how to insert them into my eye... Yes, I'm a fast learner. Anyway. Once you put in the new contacts you instantly realize how much of the world you've been missing. There is no going back to the old prescription once you've tried the new.

You don't realize how messed up your life is until God starts fixing it. But, like with the contacts, once you've seen the new way there's no going back to how life used to be. Like the hymn says, "I have decided to follow Jesus. No turning back; no turning back." Once you've allowed Him to work in your life there should be no holding back, no pulling away. No turning back.

<>< Katie

Clothing

"I'm joining a nudist colony," I announced to my mother this afternoon.

"Um... Ok. Why?"

I spent two hours traveling through every clothing store in the mall, and I came home with four books and a new contacts perscription. Everything I tried on at had something wrong with it: This shirt makes me think of Grandpa, what's with the bows?, it looks like a checkerboard, if I wanted jeans with holes in them I'd wear the ones I have, yeah that's nice but move and boom FREE SHOW!... On and on and on for two hours.

Dressing modestly in today's world is a challenge. To put it lightly. Sure, there's always the popular potato sack, but really how can one run in a potato sack?

"Pick up the Phone, Dummy!"

My grandpa loves to stand on top of something (tree stump, dock, chair, etc.), point his hands in the air, and yell, "For my next dive!" He then pretends he's diving in. Well, my glasses wanted to try that yesterday, but they missed the pretend part. That's right, they sky dived (sky dove?) off my shelf and onto the ground about six-feet below. The first clank told me they hit the floor. It was the second clank that worried me. In the morning, I had to put in my contacts to find my glasses. How funny is that? As it turns out, one of the lenses popped out, but I was able to get it back in! Yay!

This encounter made me think of another famous Grandpa quote. Last summer, my mom called my grandparents, but for some reason the phone wasn't connecting. My family is very prone to phone issues. We've had phone issues ever since my parents went on their honeymoon and a friend had their phone cancelled as a prank... haha


Anyway, this conversation between my grandpa and my mom was your typical:

"Hello? HELLO?! Is anyone there? HELLO?!" Meanwhile, my mom is on the other end screaming that she can hear him, she's really there... but it's not going through. Finally he just got so fed up, he said, "PICK UP THE PHONE, YOU BIG DUMMY!" He then hung up on her.


Obviously he had no idea it was my mom calling and thought she was a telemarketer. Just goes to show you never know the full story. You never know what kind of day someone else has had. Before getting snippy or rude with them, remember maybe today is the day where everything in their life has gone wrong. Even though you weren't being very loud while video chatting in the middle of the afternoon, the neighbors were having a rough day and took it out on you. You never really know what's going on unless you ask (and even then you only know as much as they are willing to tell).

In Christ,
<>< Katie

"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. " John 13: 34