Let's face it: we all say funny stuff. Sometimes it made sense in our heads and didn't come out correctly, sometimes it didn't make sense inside and still came out, and sometimes it's only funny when plucked from context.
Chris: If you're going to call 9-1-1, you should take a picture first.
Katie: I'm not going to use that as a rule of thumb, but if it involves Big Foot, then I definitely agree.
Mom: Your parents are in a tornado warning, by the way.
Dad: My parents? Do they know that?
Elizabeth: I wonder if I can do that (she ran her hand along the hairdo on a magazine model)
Katie: You should try it.
Elizabeth: I might need to borrow your head.
Laura: My elbow hurts. No it doesn't. I just felt like saying that.
Jay: Abs of steel! Grunt! Oh, don't do it.
Gwen: Where was I? Why was I here eating cake?
I was sitting in my room reading a book, as I had been for the last several hours. Laura burst in (without knocking) to tell me about a conversation she thinks she overheard.
Christina: Katie smells like sesame chicken.
Mom: Katie is sesame chicken.
Thanks. Thanks a lot.
Mom: Get your toe-jams out of my armpit!
[Dad has Katie in a headlock]
Dad: You're getting too old for this.
Katie: No, you're getting too old for this.
Christina: Mom, when's my ortho appointment?
Mom: Ortho? You mean dentist appointment.
Christina: Whichever one is to get rid of my big jumble of guts.
Mom: Most people call them wisdom teeth.
Dad: Brett, look at the back of your dad's head, Ryan's dad's head, and my head. How do you think that happened?
Brett [age 13]: Too many noogies.
Dad: Who is the noogie loser?
I had just done a Margarita with a Twist (a flip) into our pool, and it messed up my contacts.
Katie: Woah, y'all are blurry.
Christina: Do you want my noodle? Here!
Katie: Funny thing, I don't need to be able to see to tread water, but thanks.
Bryce [age 15, practically my cousin]: Katie, come to the park with us! We'll find cute boys.
(a few hours later)
Bryce: I got this for you. It's a friendship for life bracelet. (He put a glow stick around my wrist)
Katie: Thanks! I didn't need to go to the park to find cute boys.
Mom: Fireflies are good bugs.
Grandma: They're even better rings!
(She killed a lightning bug and stuck it's butt on her ring finger... she then said it was even prettier than the diamond Grandpa bought for her).