Dear 2012,
This year we welcome your arrival with New York. No waiting in the past to see how your first hour turns out before we take the leap.
But it's ok. I'm ready to welcome you, 2012. I think.
Your sister 2011's report card reads, "Not living up to potential."
She brought the change she promised but not the good kind.
Throughout 2011, the word I kept returning to was: faithful. Would I be faithful to the Lord even when life was less kind? Would God be true to the promise of His faithfulness?
Faithful.
Crossing into your realms, 2012, is an action of fear. An action of trust. A myriad of feelings. A juxtaposition of emotion. I am concerned about what you will bring.
Yet still I dare to hope. You bring with you new opportunities, renewed passions, and uncontainable excitement. While you may not look exactly like I would hope or anticipate, I step into you with confidence.
Hope.
That's what I feel when I look to you, 2012. I hope for many of the same things as last year: a job, a boy, a future. But, above all, I hope for the Lord. I hope to seek and to see Him in the good, the bad, and the ugly. Through tears of joy and tears of pain, I want to gaze into the eyes of my Abba Father.
I hope to dwell in the shelter of the Most High, to rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
I hope to be calmed with His love and be delighted with His songs.
I hope. In Him.
And that is enough.
"Yet I still dare to hope when I remember this: The faithful love of the Lord never ends! His mercies never cease. Great is His faithfulness; His mercies begin afresh each morning. I say to myself, 'The Lord is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in Him!'" Lamentations 3:21-24 NLT
With hope,
<>< Katie
Showing posts with label Lord. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Lord. Show all posts
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Monday, November 7, 2011
Communion
I was a little frazzled as I headed towards the front of church for communion. Our self-guided section turned into a mob rather than a line. By the time we half-organized ourselves, I was ready for body, blood, seat. That fast.
I stepped to the front, held my hands out for the wafer, and looked up into the face of our senior pastor. Pastor Mike stopped and looked back at me.
"They're letting everybody in today!" He teased.
It's a joke I've heard many times over the last few years, but it still catches me off-guard every time. I chuckle but my first thought is always, "This is a church; we should be letting everybody in."
To be confronted with this joke at the communion table helped me remember that I am not worthy to even be let in the door much less invited to approach the table of grace or enjoy the sweet taste of forgiveness. This isn't a weekly ritual we do even when the lines turn into mobs... it's a beautiful gift purchased by the ultimate sacrifice.
Pastor Mike placed the wafer in my hand. "Body of our Lord," he said.
In my hands I clutched the tangible reminder of that gift, that forgiveness, that perfect love that I am not worthy of. The body of Christ given for me. The body of our Lord--Pastor Mike's and mine. We may not always agree yet share a common goal: to serve and honor Him. Along with Christians worldwide, we share hope, faith, and forgiveness through Christ. He's our Lord.
"It's good to see you," he said, smacking me playfully in the arm.
I was out of town for the entire month of October. He noticed. Thousands of members and he noticed my absence. Billions of people on earth yet when we haven't spent quality time with the Lord, He notices. Billions of people on earth and when we sit at His feet, He's glad to see us.
I ate the bread, drank the wine, and got lost on my way back to my seat. Both literally among the sea of people and pews but also figuratively in the beauty of that moment I shared with the Lord.
Thankful for grace,
<>< Katie
I stepped to the front, held my hands out for the wafer, and looked up into the face of our senior pastor. Pastor Mike stopped and looked back at me.
"They're letting everybody in today!" He teased.
It's a joke I've heard many times over the last few years, but it still catches me off-guard every time. I chuckle but my first thought is always, "This is a church; we should be letting everybody in."
To be confronted with this joke at the communion table helped me remember that I am not worthy to even be let in the door much less invited to approach the table of grace or enjoy the sweet taste of forgiveness. This isn't a weekly ritual we do even when the lines turn into mobs... it's a beautiful gift purchased by the ultimate sacrifice.
Pastor Mike placed the wafer in my hand. "Body of our Lord," he said.
In my hands I clutched the tangible reminder of that gift, that forgiveness, that perfect love that I am not worthy of. The body of Christ given for me. The body of our Lord--Pastor Mike's and mine. We may not always agree yet share a common goal: to serve and honor Him. Along with Christians worldwide, we share hope, faith, and forgiveness through Christ. He's our Lord.
"It's good to see you," he said, smacking me playfully in the arm.
I was out of town for the entire month of October. He noticed. Thousands of members and he noticed my absence. Billions of people on earth yet when we haven't spent quality time with the Lord, He notices. Billions of people on earth and when we sit at His feet, He's glad to see us.
I ate the bread, drank the wine, and got lost on my way back to my seat. Both literally among the sea of people and pews but also figuratively in the beauty of that moment I shared with the Lord.
Thankful for grace,
<>< Katie
Saturday, October 29, 2011
Flowers
Right now I'm participating in an online bookclub through Bloom (in)courage and we're reading What Women Fear by Angie Smith.
I've been reading the chapter in the book, watching the corresponding video, and participating in discussion. Yesterday was Chapter 7: Fear of Not Being Significant.
In the video, co-host Jessica Turner told a story she heard from a woman named Roseann.
Roseann's mentor, Miss Helen, had passed away and in visiting the gravesite, Roseann noticed her grave stone had cracked and there wasn't even a place to put flowers. Of course, she demanded the gravestone be fixed. As for the flowers, she realized that Miss Helen loved the Lord and she now has flowers all over the world.
I have recently started collecting/ taking photos of flowers around the world and sticking scripture on them with the intent to hang them in my bathroom (when I have a bathroom). I thought it was a cool idea to be reminded of God's truths but also of His people around the world.
But now it has become more than that. I want to love the Lord to the point where it shows no matter where I go. I want to leave a glimpse of the Father in myself as flowers around the world. As I collect international flowers, I also want to leave flowers for the Lord.
Blooming,
<>< Katie
I've been reading the chapter in the book, watching the corresponding video, and participating in discussion. Yesterday was Chapter 7: Fear of Not Being Significant.
In the video, co-host Jessica Turner told a story she heard from a woman named Roseann.
Roseann's mentor, Miss Helen, had passed away and in visiting the gravesite, Roseann noticed her grave stone had cracked and there wasn't even a place to put flowers. Of course, she demanded the gravestone be fixed. As for the flowers, she realized that Miss Helen loved the Lord and she now has flowers all over the world.
I have recently started collecting/ taking photos of flowers around the world and sticking scripture on them with the intent to hang them in my bathroom (when I have a bathroom). I thought it was a cool idea to be reminded of God's truths but also of His people around the world.
But now it has become more than that. I want to love the Lord to the point where it shows no matter where I go. I want to leave a glimpse of the Father in myself as flowers around the world. As I collect international flowers, I also want to leave flowers for the Lord.
Blooming,
<>< Katie
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
A Run in the Park
My family and I used to go to Lifest for the bands. Hours were spent circling artist names in the program and making a strategic plan of where we needed to be and when. Unfortunately for me, long gone are the years when I spent five days running from stage to stage, from mosh pit to lawn chair, from merch table to meet and greet line.
This past opening night of Lifest we got caught in the madness where the one-lane road through the park became a parking lot. The only show I wanted to see all evening was to start in four minutes. So still in the holding pattern at the park's entrance, I abandoned my family and our minivan. I began to walk with a purpose towards a party with a purpose. It took me fifteen minutes to walk from the park entrance to the fairgrounds entrance (in case you ever need to know).
Fifteen minutes is long time to repeatedly glance at your watch and realize you're missing the only show you wanted to see that day. It's also a long time to question if you're approaching with the right heart.
Even if I miss my show, will tonight still be worth it? Am I willing to hear from the Lord through a speaker I've never heard of, a band whose CD I have never purchased? Am I here for an artist, a speaker, or am I here for the Lord?
Valid questions to take my mind off of the ticking minutes.
A fifteen minute jog through the park, thirteen minutes in line to exchange my ticket for a wristband, and I finally made it to the Grandstand as Peder Eide was wrapping up "Yes, Lord" and beginning a new song, "We are Not Orphans." A new, new song. So new the CD it's on won't be released until July 15th. Peder has personally told me about this song twice, but I've been waiting a year to hear it.
A year. No embellishing.
I thought I was late. Twenty-three minutes late, to be exact. Twenty-three minutes late to a forty minute show.
I wasn't. I was right on time. Sure, I missed the first twenty-three minutes that I would have thoroughly enjoyed, but I was right on time to hear the song I had been anxiously awaiting.
It was a beautiful moment.
"I haven't forgotten. Welcome to Lifest. We've been waiting for you," the Lord whispered to me.
It might have taken twenty-three minutes of anxiety, but once again I could honestly proclaim, "God, I'm all in. I'm here for You. Not the artists, not the speakers, not the expo center, not the camaraderie. I'm here for YOU!"
What a wonderful feeling that is!
When's the last time you spent fifteen minutes running through a (figurative) park adjusting the focus of your heart? When's the last time you let your Abba Father sing over you and remind you of His goodness? He's waiting.
"For the Lord your God is living among you.
He is a mighty savior.
He will take delight in you with gladness.
With his love, he will calm all your fears.
He will rejoice over you with joyful songs."
Zephaniah 3:17 NLT
This past opening night of Lifest we got caught in the madness where the one-lane road through the park became a parking lot. The only show I wanted to see all evening was to start in four minutes. So still in the holding pattern at the park's entrance, I abandoned my family and our minivan. I began to walk with a purpose towards a party with a purpose. It took me fifteen minutes to walk from the park entrance to the fairgrounds entrance (in case you ever need to know).
Fifteen minutes is long time to repeatedly glance at your watch and realize you're missing the only show you wanted to see that day. It's also a long time to question if you're approaching with the right heart.
Even if I miss my show, will tonight still be worth it? Am I willing to hear from the Lord through a speaker I've never heard of, a band whose CD I have never purchased? Am I here for an artist, a speaker, or am I here for the Lord?
Valid questions to take my mind off of the ticking minutes.
A fifteen minute jog through the park, thirteen minutes in line to exchange my ticket for a wristband, and I finally made it to the Grandstand as Peder Eide was wrapping up "Yes, Lord" and beginning a new song, "We are Not Orphans." A new, new song. So new the CD it's on won't be released until July 15th. Peder has personally told me about this song twice, but I've been waiting a year to hear it.
A year. No embellishing.
I thought I was late. Twenty-three minutes late, to be exact. Twenty-three minutes late to a forty minute show.
I wasn't. I was right on time. Sure, I missed the first twenty-three minutes that I would have thoroughly enjoyed, but I was right on time to hear the song I had been anxiously awaiting.
It was a beautiful moment.
"I haven't forgotten. Welcome to Lifest. We've been waiting for you," the Lord whispered to me.
It might have taken twenty-three minutes of anxiety, but once again I could honestly proclaim, "God, I'm all in. I'm here for You. Not the artists, not the speakers, not the expo center, not the camaraderie. I'm here for YOU!"
What a wonderful feeling that is!
When's the last time you spent fifteen minutes running through a (figurative) park adjusting the focus of your heart? When's the last time you let your Abba Father sing over you and remind you of His goodness? He's waiting.
"For the Lord your God is living among you.
He is a mighty savior.
He will take delight in you with gladness.
With his love, he will calm all your fears.
He will rejoice over you with joyful songs."
Zephaniah 3:17 NLT
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Listening in the Silence
I don't really know if this is blog-appropriate or not but I can't help but share God's sense of humor.
I am very bad at sitting and doing nothing. Ask my roommates. I'm always doing something, working on something, going somewhere, or refreshing some internet page. I don't sit still. I like to be busy. The minute I'm done eating, I'm out of the caf. As soon as there's a pause in the conversation, I excuse myself. Even when going to bed at night, I focus on praying rather than my constant to-do list or the fictional characters running around in my head. I like constant motion.
This whole unemployed thing brings constant motion to a screeching halt.
I am trying to use this opportunity to learn to sit in silence before the Lord. Sit and be still (although, I still wiggle my toes). Turn off the brain (harder than it sounds). Don't write, don't read, don't do anything but listen.
The first afternoon I tried, I fell asleep. I rarely nap during the day and I was sitting on the floor... Two hours later I woke up with a sore neck and no conversation with the Lord.
After dinner, I sat back down on my bedroom floor to try again. I turned off the music. Turned off the computer. Silenced the phone. Put away the notebook. And sat in silence, listening for the quiet whispered. This time I kept my eyes open.
Katie: Ok, God, I'm listening.
And what did I hear?
Someone farting in the bathroom on the other side of the wall. Not just one. My private, silent moment with the Lord was interrupted by someone elses' private, not-so-silent moment.
Katie: Wow, You're funny.
That's one of my favorite things to say to God. A sarcastic, "Wow, You're funny."
Two lessons learned here:
1. God does have a sense of humor.
2. No sitting in silence in the bedroom.
But I'm going to keep trying to sit in silence, as soon as I find a fart-free location where I'm not at risk of falling asleep.
Learning to listen,
<>< Katie
I am very bad at sitting and doing nothing. Ask my roommates. I'm always doing something, working on something, going somewhere, or refreshing some internet page. I don't sit still. I like to be busy. The minute I'm done eating, I'm out of the caf. As soon as there's a pause in the conversation, I excuse myself. Even when going to bed at night, I focus on praying rather than my constant to-do list or the fictional characters running around in my head. I like constant motion.
This whole unemployed thing brings constant motion to a screeching halt.
I am trying to use this opportunity to learn to sit in silence before the Lord. Sit and be still (although, I still wiggle my toes). Turn off the brain (harder than it sounds). Don't write, don't read, don't do anything but listen.
The first afternoon I tried, I fell asleep. I rarely nap during the day and I was sitting on the floor... Two hours later I woke up with a sore neck and no conversation with the Lord.
After dinner, I sat back down on my bedroom floor to try again. I turned off the music. Turned off the computer. Silenced the phone. Put away the notebook. And sat in silence, listening for the quiet whispered. This time I kept my eyes open.
Katie: Ok, God, I'm listening.
And what did I hear?
Someone farting in the bathroom on the other side of the wall. Not just one. My private, silent moment with the Lord was interrupted by someone elses' private, not-so-silent moment.
Katie: Wow, You're funny.
That's one of my favorite things to say to God. A sarcastic, "Wow, You're funny."
Two lessons learned here:
1. God does have a sense of humor.
2. No sitting in silence in the bedroom.
But I'm going to keep trying to sit in silence, as soon as I find a fart-free location where I'm not at risk of falling asleep.
Learning to listen,
<>< Katie
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Blessing in Disguise
My friend Elizabeth was asked to lead an evening twenty-somethings Bible study at her church. No one thought to give her a key to the church, and she didn't think to ask for it.
So, after dinner, we pulled up to church without a way to get inside. Instead, we set up camp in the parking lot and began to study the Word of the Lord.
The evening was beautiful. A light breeze, no humidity, and a beautiful sunset. If we had had a key, we would have missed the beautiful day God created for us! It was absolutely perfect for sitting outside.
While we were finishing up our study, the pastor drove up and offered to let us inside. We were all pretty content with where we were. Then he told us they were going to shoot off fireworks from the field next to the church in a few minutes.
If we had been inside, we would have missed the fireworks, the coolest end to Bible study ever.
Sometimes what's seen as a problem, such as a lack of a key, can really be a blessing in disguise.
Are you looking for blessings in disguise?
<>< Katie
So, after dinner, we pulled up to church without a way to get inside. Instead, we set up camp in the parking lot and began to study the Word of the Lord.
The evening was beautiful. A light breeze, no humidity, and a beautiful sunset. If we had had a key, we would have missed the beautiful day God created for us! It was absolutely perfect for sitting outside.
While we were finishing up our study, the pastor drove up and offered to let us inside. We were all pretty content with where we were. Then he told us they were going to shoot off fireworks from the field next to the church in a few minutes.
If we had been inside, we would have missed the fireworks, the coolest end to Bible study ever.
Sometimes what's seen as a problem, such as a lack of a key, can really be a blessing in disguise.
Are you looking for blessings in disguise?
<>< Katie
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Falling Asleep While Praying
Last night, I fell asleep while praying.
The night before, I fell asleep while praying.
I don't remember the night before that, but I bet I fell asleep while praying.
Been there? Done that?
I used to fell bad about it. I mean, if I were in the middle of the conversation and the person I was talking to fell asleep, I'd be upset, right?
I don't feel bad about it anymore. In fact, I make it my goal to fall asleep while praying.
I'd much rather fall asleep with my thoughts focused on God than to finish praying and fall asleep worrying about tomorrow. I love for my day to end in conversation with the Lord.
Try it sometime. The peace that comes from it is... well, God-given.
<>< Katie
PS: But I don't fall asleep every time I pray...
The night before, I fell asleep while praying.
I don't remember the night before that, but I bet I fell asleep while praying.
Been there? Done that?
I used to fell bad about it. I mean, if I were in the middle of the conversation and the person I was talking to fell asleep, I'd be upset, right?
I don't feel bad about it anymore. In fact, I make it my goal to fall asleep while praying.
I'd much rather fall asleep with my thoughts focused on God than to finish praying and fall asleep worrying about tomorrow. I love for my day to end in conversation with the Lord.
Try it sometime. The peace that comes from it is... well, God-given.
<>< Katie
PS: But I don't fall asleep every time I pray...
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Dancing Like David
David danced before the Lord.
We know this. It's a popular verse. (2 Samuel 6:14). The part we tend to skip over is that he was wearing only an linen ephod. He was in his underwear.
When was the last time you danced in your underwear? (Don't answer that).
But seriously, if dancing in your underwear isn't acceptable in our time, I highly doubt it was accepted in David's.
When was the last time you did something socially unacceptable but for God's glory? When was the last time you didn't care what others thought? When was the last time you praised God in the way you felt most appropriate (no pun intended)? (You can answer those).
<>< Katie
PS: Inspired by Francis Chan's Forgotten God.
We know this. It's a popular verse. (2 Samuel 6:14). The part we tend to skip over is that he was wearing only an linen ephod. He was in his underwear.
When was the last time you danced in your underwear? (Don't answer that).
But seriously, if dancing in your underwear isn't acceptable in our time, I highly doubt it was accepted in David's.
When was the last time you did something socially unacceptable but for God's glory? When was the last time you didn't care what others thought? When was the last time you praised God in the way you felt most appropriate (no pun intended)? (You can answer those).
<>< Katie
PS: Inspired by Francis Chan's Forgotten God.
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