Showing posts with label writer. Show all posts
Showing posts with label writer. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Voice (Ghostwriting Part Three)

Two weeks ago we began unpacking the idea of ghostwriting. Be sure to check out the first two posts: Moral and Famous.

One thing I have failed to mention is that I am a ghostwriter. Not just for the Lord. And not for my freelance coworker who's going to make me famous. (I resigned from that job when he said something snarky about Northerners).

As a ghostwriter, I have spent a significant amount of time with my authors trying to identify their voice. I listen to the way she speaks, the way he tells stories, and her patterns of speech. I have to replicate it.

It's a challenging (fun-challenging) job where I set myself aside and speak as someone else. When I write "I," I don't mean "Katie." When I say "we," I may or may not be part of that crowd. My favorite words disappear, and his quips appear.

It takes a lot of practice to sound like someone who isn't Katie. (Then it takes practice to sound like Katie again). It's the process of finding the author's tone or her voice to accurately represent her.

If we are all ghostwriters in that we are all to be invisible and God visible, then we too need to practice finding His voice.

The more time my author and I spend talking, the easier it is for me to pick up on his patterns of speech, word choice, and idiosyncrasies (we all have them).

The more time I spend with the Lord, the easier it is to pick up on His voice as well. Is what I think God is saying consistent with His word? When I open my mouth, am I speaking the voice of the Encourager, Comforter or am I speaking as sinner Katie?

Just like I don't always get voice right in my writing, I certainly don't always get it right in my life.

I tear down instead of building up. I cling to fear rather than trust. I hesitate rather than stepping in obedience.

But I haven't given up. I'm going to keep trying. The end prize will be worth it. Nothing will be for my glory but rather the One who deserves the glory. The God who put up with my blundering, who was willing to work through my failures, who took a chance in me.

<>< Katie

Friday, March 9, 2012

Being Called

Our conversation was brief. Just long enough to drive from the coffee shop back to her dorm.

She spoke about how she was studying for a test in her missiology class. We spoke about Compassion. I mentioned that I'm a writer. She said she feels called by God to open an orphanage in a specific African country.

I wanted to practice asking questions. Why that specific country? What did her call look like? Why start an orphanage rather than work for an existing one? For once I had no shortage of questions.

We did have a shortage of time. So I packed my questions away to save for a future opportunity.

As I drove home I wondered what it would be like to have such a clear calling on my life. To know--at the start of my college career or earlier--what I wanted to do for God's kingdom. I figured it must be nice.

I'm just a writer with a degree and no idea where God's calling her to step next. I was jealous of her and admired her all at the same time. I wanted my own clear calling.

I saw her again two day later. Before I could pour out my question box, she mentioned that maybe she wasn't interested in that specific country. She'd heard some terrifying things that had happened there. Part of me wanted to tell her not to give up her dreams. The other part of me breathed a sigh of relief.

She's just like me: some clue of what to do but no idea what it will actually look like once she gets there. She didn't get a jet-stream message from the Lord. Her confidence was as thin as mine when I said I was a writer.

True, I am a writer. A freelance writer. A ghostwriter. A professional writer. An underpaid/underemployed writer. A blog-writer. I didn't say all of that. I just said, "Writer." It sounds better that way.

True, she's studying missiology (the study of missions) because she's got a heart for missions. True she wants to care for orphans. True she loves Compassion as much as I do. Maybe true she'll start her own orphanage and maybe true it'll be in that specific African country. But who knows.

God does.

And right now, He's not telling.

For either of us.

<>< Katie

Friday, February 10, 2012

Capture the Moment

For Christmas I got a new camera. A nice one. Like super nice. Like my professional photographer uncle did months of the research, and this is his pocket camera.  It’s sweet, and I’m beyond excited about it.

But with a great camera comes great responsibility. Now I have to use it.

No longer will blurry, off-center candids be acceptable. No longer can I only photograph people doing silly things.

Instead, I need to look at the world through the eyes of a photographer.

Have you ever traveled or worked with a photographer? They see the world differently than we do. They notice what we overlook. They capture those sweet moments we can only hold in our hearts.

I consider myself a fairly observant person but compared to a photographer I'm oblivious.

I'm a writer. I should already be striving to capture those little moments, those subtleties that mean so much.

I'm a Christian. I'm supposed to be hearing both what's said and what's left unsaid.

I guess we all have a huge responsibility, no matter the device we hold in our hands or hearts.

Watching, listening, learning, observing,
<>< Katie

Friday, January 6, 2012

Returning Home

I didn't do it intentionally. Honest!

Things like Christmas, family vacation, pre-planned blogposts, and a sore arm had gotten in the way. All of the sudden it had been... well, way too long.

It hadn't felt like it had been a long time otherwise I would have taken care of it long before I flopped down on a king size log bed with a purple pen and my Writer's Notebook.

Yup, I was rusty. It hurt. And I silently cursed myself for smacking my forearm on whatever I was clumsy enough to crash into.

But I loved it.

It felt so good to be back, to be doing something I loved. It was a deep breath of rich air. It was calming and refreshing.

I pushed through the pain of the pen's movement across the page. I slowly shook the dust from the dictionary stored in my corner of my brain. I smiled as I saw the influence of other writers and as the piece took a different direction than I anticipated.

It was good. It was home.

Home is watching my fingers bleed purple ink.

Home is the opening chords of a familiar song.

Home is digging into the Word when you've gotten busy, lazy, and unintentional.

Home is freedom and fresh air. Comfort, love, and uncontainable joy.

Home is sleeping between your own sheets after a long vacation. Home is hugs waiting for you at the door and milk in the fridge.

While the physical location of home is changing once again, the emotional feeling of home follows me wherever I go.

For this I am grateful.

I am also grateful for grace. For hobbies, no, for ways of life, that return after having been abandoned.

<>< Katie

Friday, July 8, 2011

Perfectionist Pen

This year I was asked to help with the rewriting and tweaking of the narrations for our church's patriotic musical.

I listened to the songs on repeat, reading the music and listening.  I puked out thoughts and words before prayerfully putting them into complete, logical sentences.

I let them sit for a few days before rereading them and sending them off to the director.  He thought they were great, so I pushed them from my mind.

I still wasn't pleased.  At the performance, I heard the start of a phrase and my first thought was, "I hope that wasn't my sentence."  It was.  The longer the narration went, the more upset I became.

Katie: Why didn't I read over that once more before sending it in?  A few changed words could have made it better.  That doesn't even make sense!  Why?  Ugh!

God: Fine, then no one can hear it.

And the sound system gave feedback for the first (and only) time all night.  The mic blew and the narrator continued.  When my phrase was over, the narrator's microphone came back on and the program continued.

God: I wrote that; you didn't.  Those words were exactly the way I wanted them to be; I'm using them as they are.  I AM the Writer; you are the pen.

Yes, Lord.

<>< Katie

Friday, July 1, 2011

Reply

I have a good friend who is very bad with email.  He admits it, and I'd say that to his face.  Usually if I get a response, it's a week later and brief.

That's a big if.  Normally, I don't get a reply.  Sometimes I wonder if I really sent the email or if I only dreamt I did.  I've considered attaching a "read receipt" so I know when he's gotten it and read it.

Except last week I was talking to him and he made a reference to something I'd said in an email.

"You do actually read my emails," I exclaimed in shock.

He assured me he does.  He reads all of them even if he doesn't respond.

Ladies and gentlemen, that's God.  He reads all of our knee-mail (sorry, that was bad).  God hears our prayers even if we don't hear His response.  In his book Too Busy Not to Pray, Bill Hybels points out that God only speaks when He has something to say.

Sometimes that quality drives me nuts.  But I take comfort in that fact that He has heard my cries.

As a writer who thrives on feedback, this silence is especially difficult.  But it's necessary.  If it weren't, God wouldn't put me through it.

So, even know I know responses will be few and far between, I will continue to email my friend.  Even know I know I may get an answer of silence, I will continue to pray to the Lord.

<>< Katie

Monday, June 6, 2011

Six Month Update: Books Style

In January I set the goal to read 25 books this year.  So far, I am ahead of where I was last year at this time. 

1. The Greatest Salesman in the World by Og Mandino
This easy-read is a fictional story with religious undertones.  It's a good book but not to be considered the answer to all things.  (Of course, I like Jesus and He's only a minor character here).

2. Choosing to See by Mary Beth Chapman with Ellen Vaughn
Some people write because they like to write.  Some people write because they have a story to tell.  Mary Beth is the second.  Choosing to See does have a mixed feeling of "I'm famous, so I wrote a book" and "I'm doing this because my counselor told me to."  But she's very vulnerable with her audience and honest about her battles with depression and the horrors of losing a child.  As a Steven Curtis Chapman fan, reading some of these stories was almost like hearing a retelling of my own family's stories in that parts were familiar and just as funny or sad as I remember them.

3. How the Garcia Girls Lost Their Accents by Julia Alvarez
This novel is really hard to write about in one paragraph since I used some of its themes to write a twenty-five page thesis.  Alavrez does a great job of opening up to the readers the world as seen by Dominican emigrants and their challenges in living in the United States, both cultural and familial.  It's written reverse-chronologically which is interesting but not necessarily a bad thing.  Definitely worth exploring.

4. Lifestories by Mark Hall with Tim Luke
Mark Hall is a youth pastor first and the lead singer of Casting Crowns second.  His book, like all of their CDs, reflects this.  It tells the stories behind the songs on the Casting Crowns and Lifesong CDs, but it's not a "sit back and have a story told to you" book.  It's a "sit, read, reflect, and grow spiritually" book.  The only thing I would have done different would have been to include the song lyrics with each corresponding chapter.  I think you're supposed to read the chapter then watch the music video.  I know better than to put down a book to turn on the computer...

5. Lipstick in Afghanistan by Roberta Gately
This novel tells the story of an ER nurse who moves to Afghanistan through Aide du Monde (ADM).  It talks about her transition to working in an Afghanistan hospital, her struggle to get to know the culture, and her effort to build relationships with the people there.  Even though parts of it broke my heart, I definitely enjoyed this book!

6. Forgotten God by Francis Chan
This is a book I'm going to have to read again I enjoyed it that much.  Chan takes a look at the Holy Spirit, or the aspect of God he declares "forgotten."  Really, how often do you give credit to the Spirit?  Check it out!  Definitely a must read!

7. Navigating the Rough Waters of Today's Publishing World by Marcia Meier
If you're clueless about today's publishing world, this book is a good resource.  If you have some background knowledge in writing and publishing, this book doesn't have a lot of new information.  However, it was interesting to get Meier's opinion on the situation.

8. Magic Hour by Kristin Hannah
This novel is the story of a psychiatrist who is being blamed for a teenager's shooting spree and suicide.  She essentially loses her practice the same time a mysterious lost child appears in her hometown where her sister is the police chief.  It's a story of questioning one's self-esteem, perseverance, and courage.  I found myself in this book in several different situations.  I'm not really sure what the title has to do with anything and the "strained family relationship" mentioned on the back cover isn't as strained as one would expect.  I enjoyed this book but I did find parts of it to be predictable. 

9. A Loss for Words by Lou Ann Walker
Lou Ann Walker is a CODA (a Child of Deaf Adults), so I picked up this autobiography to see a slightly different perspective on Deafness.  Parts of the story broke my heart in how her parents (and her entire family) were treated. Parts of it I enjoyed and parts I thought droned on too long.  Walker's a journalist so sometime she just wrote what happened and didn't drawn any conclusions which frustrates me as a writer.

10. Over the Edge by Brandilyn Collins
I won this book from a blog giveaway, so I wasn't really sure what to expect.  I loved it!  Maybe it was my pre-existing interest in Lyme disease or how well the book is written, but I devoured it in three days!  It has a lot of good information about Lyme and isn't too technical while also telling a compelling story.  My only real criticism would be that during the most intense moments of the story, it seemed Jannie's Lyme symptoms were ignored or forgotten.  The plot line is a lot of building and then a quick ending but it wasn't necessarily bad.  Of the novels on this list, I think this one was my favorite.

11. Friendships for Grown-Ups by Lisa Whelchel
This book holds hints of, "I'm famous, so I wrote a book about my life" but it also have some very helpful information regarding friendship in adulthood.  One thing that I found especially useful is the resources at the end containing practical tips about being intentional with friendships and building relationships.  Sometimes Whelchel went into what I would consider to be superfluous details with each relationship scenario that I felt could have been summed up with an, "Every relationship is different."  But I know some people want that kind of detail and information regarding the differences in relationships.

Current Moving Bookmarks:
Too Busy Not to Pray by Bill Hybels
Grace for the Moment by Max Lucado
Saints at the River by Ron Rash

Reading Wish List:
Outlive Your Life by Max Lucado
Twelve Extraordinary Women by John MacArthur
Crazy Love by Francis Chan
Eli the Good by Silas House
I own books 2-10, so if you want to borrow them, please let me know.

My parents bought a Kindle they're going to let me take to China, so I need to make a list of what I want to read on the plane.

What have you been reading lately?  What should I check out?

<>< Katie

Monday, May 30, 2011

Show Don't Tell

Writers hear it all the time.

"Show don't tell."

Show your character is mad with his words and actions, don't just tell the readers he's mad.

But this advice does not only apply to writers.

"Show don't tell."

Show someone you love her with your actions, don't just tell her with your words.
Show someone you're praying for him by praying over him right there, don't just say you'll do it.

"Show don't tell."

Try it.

<>< Katie

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Author Interview: Jennifer Rogers Spinola

Hey, friends! All the cool kids are doing author interviews… so I figured I’d do one of my own. Jennifer Rogers Spinola is going through the process of publishing her novel, Southern Fried Sushi, that will be released in October 2011. Jenny currently lives in Brazil with her Brazilian husband Athos and their adopted son Ethan. For more information, check out her website at http://www.jenniferrogerspinola.com/
<>< Katie

Katie: You’re in the process of publishing a novel. Tell us a little bit about Southern Fried Sushi. What should readers expect?

Jenny: Here's a portion from the original proposal: "An independent journalist coming face-to-face with her past, must start over again among the least likely people in the last place she'd expect."

The book follows award-winning journalist Shiloh Jacobs through a series of gut-wrenching events that force her out of Tokyo and the writing job she loves and to a hick, Southern Virginia town she's never heard of. The question is this: Can Shiloh, stuck in this small town with only a handful of unlikely friends to call family, find a way out?

As Shiloh begins to unravel the secret that changed her mother's life so powerfully, Shiloh realizes she must make a decision: to find forgiveness for her painful past or shut the door on God—and her troubled family life—forever.

Katie: What inspired this book?

Jenny: Since I'm a small-town girl who moved to Japan, I started to wonder what the opposite would be like. Gawking at skyscrapers is one thing but what would someone used to skyscrapers do in my small hometown where the biggest building is the local Wal-Mart? That intrigued me. A lot of story ideas start with plain old what ifs.

The other thing that led to this book is when I realized I was always writing about stuff that required research, stuff I didn't know very well. So one day I thought, "What if I write on a topic I know about?" And when I boiled it down, I realized I don't have "exciting" expertise in some area like medicine, forensic investigation, or something of the like that sells books. So what do I know about? 1) rednecks 2) living abroad

Katie: What have you learned through the process of writing a novel, the challenge of getting it published, and now the publishing process?

Jenny: Wow... where to begin? I have always loved to write. Period. I know nothing about publishing novels, and I'm not even in the right country to go to writer's conferences and learn all that stuff. But in impossible situations like mine is exactly where God loves to step in. The biggest help I've had came from fellow author (and former coworker) Roger Bruner, who had just received a contract with the same publishing company and walked me through the process step by step.

I've learned:
- Finish your novel, no matter what, because that forces you to write and think and work through the rough spots.
- Make use of a critique group, a dedicated small group of writers that come together and give encouragement.
- You just have to write. That's it. Every day. Even if you have no ideas. Even if what you write stinks. As long as you’re writing something, anything, those creative juices flow. And then finish.
- Publishing isn't as easy as it used to be (if it ever was). The market is flooded, so you have to come up with something different from what everybody else is doing but not so different that it won't sell.
- Reading helps writing. Try to always read someone better than you, and you'll pick up good habits.
- You can't send query letters anymore. The publishing market has changed significantly. Publishers don't read unsolicited stuff. You either have to have an agent, meet an interested editor at a writer's conference, or know someone who's already in the business. The bottom line is, though, that God still makes away even for the clueless, like me, when the time is right.
- Go to writer's conferences. I learned SO MUCH about writing and marketing, plus met lots of fellow writers, neat agents and editors, and bought cheap books.

Katie: How do you balance your time between writing, your family, a social life, and other responsibilities?
Jenny: It's really difficult with a husband, young child, church, plus friends, English (ESL) students, and all the work it takes to keep a home running in a foreign country.

So I do a couple of things:
- Get up early with my husband and write while he studies
- Shower in the evening. Really. Then when my two-year-old sleeps around mid-day I can spend my time writing not showering and drying my hair.
- Make writing a priority. If I have an hour of quiet time on the weekend, I usually choose to write. I always choose writing time over reading time because it's much easier to stick a book in your bag and read in line, read in the car, read outside while my son plays, but it's much harder to get that focused time where I can sit, think, and plug in my laptop.

Katie: What are some of your writing habits?
Jenny: If I get stuck I just write SOMETHING. Then when I realize I don't like it (doesn't take very long), it forces me to write something else.

I also try to keep at least one writing project on the back burner, even if I'm working on something else, so that I'm never without something to think/write about.

When I'm really into a crucial section in a story, I'll sometimes write for hours at a time, eating at my desk, and writing and rewriting paragraphs until I'm happy with it. Now that my son is bigger, it's harder to do that, so when I can't sit at my computer and write, I mentally go over plotlines and even individual words while I make lunch or change diapers so that when I get a minute, all that thinking comes out in one written chunk.

Katie: If you could be any two inanimate objects, what would you be and why?
1. A tree somewhere on top of a mountain. Living in the city, I miss nature. But I miss total expanses of wilderness. Mountain rains. Dawns. Falling leaves. Streams with bends that no one sees.
2. A Japanese fan, with all the color and life folded neatly inside its deceptively fragile paper.

Katie: Thank you so much for your time. Is there anything else you'd like to add?
Jenny: Well, my life sure has turned out differently than I expected. I left full-time writing a few years back to serve as a short-term Baptist missionary in Japan which changed my life and outlook on many things. I also met my Brazilian husband there; we got married after my term ended and moved to Brazil. Now we've adopted a son who was born at 24 weeks with major medical issues, and we've seen God's healing miracle in his life, so that we can hardly contain our joy at his health and happiness and love of life.

If you'd have asked me back in college if my life would end up this way, I'd have laughed out loud. I was dating a local boy from home in Virginia and planning to get married after graduation. I never wanted to be a missionary and prayed God would never send me overseas.

My biggest advice: Follow God. Love God. He works everything out in your life in a greater way than you can imagine. And He *loves* surprises.

Thursday, December 30, 2010

A Year in Review: Books Style

I started 2009 with a goal of reading 13 books, one a month and one more.  Since books for class don't count and I took three literature classes in 2009, that was a feasible goal.  I read 14.  So my goal this year was 17, and I hit 22.  I think that means in 2011 I have to read 25...

1. Five Love Languages: Singles Edition by Gary Chapman

2. The Condition by Jennifer Haigh

3. June Bug by Chris Farby

My thoughts on books 4-9 and some more can be found here

4. In the Time of the Butterflies by Julia Alvarez
A must-read if you like historical fiction and/or Latina America.

5. The Help by Kathryn Stockett
Historical fiction set in the Jackson, Mississippi, during the Civil Rights Era

6. The Wednesday Letters by Jason Wright
Laura, my dyslexic sister, devoured this book.

7. A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Houssini
Christina, my other dyslexic sister, is eager to read this book.  It's a must read if you like historical fiction and Afghanistan.

8. Invisible I by Stella Lennon
Part of The Amanda Project

9. The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins
My boss asked me to read this book.  I never would have done it on my own, but I enjoyed it!

10. Unspoken Lies by Darrien Lee
I went to Barnes & Noble looking for a short book and bought this one just because it fit that description.  Honestly, the only reason I kept reading this book was because I liked the exposition.  I was not impressed with the dialogue, storyline or ending.  The whole story revolved around the characters having affairs and getting away with it, and the ending seemed like a cop out.  I don't recommend it, sorry.

11. A Million Miles in a Thousand Years by Donald Miller
I read this book as a writer and it was good.  I would love to go back and read it again, this time just as a person.  My roommates and I have embraced his idea of filling life with memorable moments.  Our first Memorable Moment was putting birthday candles in Amy and Melia's chicken breast instead of in their cake.  I do recommend this book but take your time reading it.  Let everything sink in before you move on to the next chapter.

12. Fearless by Max Lucado
I didn't realize how much control fear has in my life until I read his book on how to get rid of it.  I love all Max Lucado books, but this is definitely one of my favorites.  If you're going to try Max for just one book, pick this one.

13. Saving CeeCee Honeycutt by Beth Hoffman
I was promised I would love this book.  And I did.  It did take me awhile to get into it, though, because I was coming off a long stretch of historical fiction books.  All of my other thoughts about it are in a Writer's Notebook at school, sorry.

14. A Novel Idea
A writing book I highly recommend if you're interested in writing Christian fiction.  I took notes.

15. "Unveiled," "Unashamed," and "Unshaken" part of A Lineage of Grace by Francine Rivers
They are three fictional short stories looked at the lives of nonfictional Tamar, Rahab, and Ruth.  Francine Rivers brings Bible characters to life in a way I've never experienced before.  I had a hard time getting into these stories at first, but I was disappointed I couldn't finish the book (I borrowed it and had to return it).  Although, if you're going to read Francine Rivers you have to read Redeeming Love.

16, 17. Catching Fire and Mockingjay by Suzanne Collins
Books two and three in The Hunger Games series.  When I read the first book, I criticized Collins for dragging the story out through three books rather than just ending it.  Maybe it's just my dislike for sequels.  I still understand why I argued that, but I'm glad she didn't ask my opinion before writing books two and three.  The books are considered young adult fiction, but I've heard of a lot of adults thoroughly enjoying them.  Elizabeth and Andy kept pestering me to read and finish them so we could all talk about them.  Catching Fire I read in one weekend, but Mockingjay I spread out over months just because it was that time in the semester.  They're not hard reads, and Mrs. Mary says her seventh graders are devouring them.  Maybe a good book for a middle schooler to read with a parent.

18. Cast of Characters by Max Lucado
This is kind of like Lineage of Grace in that it takes Bible characters and focuses in on their lives.  The way Max (can you call the author by his first name when you've read 15 of his books?) brings the characters to life forced me to think about them in ways that had never crossed my mind before.  It's also a devotional so you can see trends between their lives then and ours today.  Are they really that much different?

19. One Foot in Eden by Ron Rash
I love Ron Rash.  I'm a little biased because I've met him twice but that's besides the point.  I prefer Serena, but I enjoyed One Foot in Eden, too.  It doesn't have the "typical Rash body count" (Rash); only a handful of (creative) deaths.  Every section is written from a different character's POV and in their voice.  I liked the overlap, hearing the same story told in two different points of view.  If I wrote it, I would have ended it one section sooner.  Actually, if I get to meet Rash again, I want to ask why he did it the way he did.

20. Grace: For Those Who Think They Don't Measure Up by Bob Lenz
Another author I've heard speak many times.  Bob writes just like he talks which was a bit of a deterrent for me since I am a writer.  The tangents he takes in real life work well.  The same principle doesn't work as well in writing.  I started reading this book years ago and just now finally finished it because I'm not his target audience.  It is a great book for youth struggling with the ideas of grace and faith.  Not so great for a 20-something confident in her faith.

21. Flight
Not a published book yet but when it does become published you can say I told you about it.  One of my friends send me the novel of another friend and asked for my feedback.  I enjoyed it, I learned from it, and I gave constructive criticism.  I look forward to seeing it on a shelf in Barnes & Noble one day.

22. The Bible
For the second year in a row I did a "Read the Bible in a year" thing.  If you've never read the Bible in a year (or ever), I recommend using this one.  It's challenging but doable.  For me, I wasn't very diligent about getting into the Word but this helped a lot.  I did spend a lot of time behind but (unless something changes in the next two days) I'm finishing on time.  I don't know if I'm going to do it again in 2011 just because after two years it's kind of assignment-like rather than a desire to seek Him.  We'll see if I can dig in without the accountability...

What have you all been reading lately?

I'm ringing in 2011 with a moving bookmark in A Love With Giving (Max Lucado) and How the Garcia Girls Lost the Accents (Julia Alvarez).  What else should I add to my list?

<>< Katie

Monday, August 30, 2010

My Friends Hate Me

Today words are not my friends.  They've been really mean to me lately.  They're tripping over each other as they fall from my mouth.  They clog like an ink blot as they're scratched from my pen.  They hate me.  And I hate it.

When technology and I don't get along, when my suitemates pick on me, when the world seems to be against me, I still have my word-friends to back me up.  Except now.

Who am I if I cannot cooperate with the English language?

I am still a daughter of God, a friend, a roommate.  I'm still a role model, a team leader, and a big sister.  But I am not me.  I am a writer.  This is what I do.  What do you do when you can't do what you do?

You blog about it.  But then you remember what Sherman Alexie said, "Every word on your blog is a word not in your book."  I guess I'm nostalgic for my book.  I reread and tweek scenes, but it isn't the same.  Sure, I still have some of the excitement about someday finishing it but that someday apparently isn't today.

I.  Am.  Frustrated.

<>< Katie

Friday, July 30, 2010

Story

Have I ever told you that I love to tell stories?  I really love to tell stories.  A lot.  Find me a good story, and I'll retell it a million times.  It's safe to say they play an important role in my life.  I find it hard to believe I'm the only one like this.  Let's face it, stories play important roles in our lives. 

My professor Brandon once said, "Stories are the webs that entangle all of us."  Stories are so important, even Jesus used them to teach.  The world communicates through stories.

Pastor Seth asked us a phenomenal question the other day when he said, "We are all storytellers.  Are we living and making stories that are worth telling?"

Donald Miller has an entire book on this entitled A Million Miles in a Thousand Years.  Max Lucado addresses this when he talks about how God not only knows your story but He wrote it.

And here's a secret: even though you are the main character in your story, it is not about you.  Look it up; check the Bible.  All stories, even your own life story, is about Jesus Christ.

Jeffrey Meinz does a great job of telling Jesus' lifestory in six minutes.  The video quality isn't great, especially for the first 25 seconds, but it gets better.  The very end gives you a nice shot of how many people where there.  You should play Where's Waldo, and see if you can find me.

But seriously, friends, is the story you're living worth telling?

<>< Katie

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Tractor on Fire; Katie on Tractor

When it comes to household jobs, cutting the grass is my favorite.  I get to fly around the yard, write, and get paid for it.  Sweet!

I'm quite a sight when I cut the grass.  Today I am wearing a blaze orange shirt, not quite matching the orange of my tractor, and brown shorts with black Chacos (I'm looking to enhance the Zorro-like tanlines on my feet).  To top it off, I'm wearing my notorious cowboy hat, I have a blue Off! fan latched to my shorts, and my iPod is strapped to my thigh using the elastic band intended for a runner's arm.  Yeah, really pretty.

I'm lost deep in thought, memories, and stories that may someday be blog-worthy when all of the sudden I hear this nasty noise.  It kind of sounds like I ran over something, but I haven't.  I keep going and there is a second noise, not as loud as the first.  At the third noise, I stop the tractor.  I see Mom inside the house walking towards me as I turn it off.

"Did you hear that?" I ask.

She assures me she has and asks what it was.  Like I know.  Then she tells me the tractor was smoking.

I hop off the tractor.   "It's on fire," I say.  "Yes, I see a flame."  Keep in mind, I hate fire.  Been there; done that.  Lived to tell the tale; have the scars to prove it.

Mom runs to get the fire extinguisher, her trademark move.  From a reasonable distance, I watch the grass burn.  There is only one flame, but it is bigger than you would see on a candle.

"Do I even know how to work this?" She asks as she pulled the pin out of the fire extinguisher.  She pushes the levers together and it blows a fog-like gas.  Well, the wind take it and it showers me with fire extinguisher fluid.

The flame goes out, our tractor needs to be serviced, our fire extinguisher needs to be inspected, and the grass still needs to be cut.  Oh, and I smell like Off!, grease, freshly cut grass, forget me nots, smoke, and fire extinguisher.

When we tell Dad what happened, he just laughs.  And laughs.  And laughs.  He's now outside trying to fix the poor piece of flaming machinery.  I told him to scream if he needs me to call 911.  All quiet in the front.

I'm fine, by the way.  A little traumatized and just as pyro-phobic as ever, but it's just another day in the life...

<>< Katie

Friday, June 18, 2010

Seat Buddy

I first noticed her at the gate.  I think it was the three bags and pillow she was carrying.  That's twice as many as the allotted number of carry-ons.  With her unkempt, wet hair and the luggage she was juggling she personified the word "disheveled."

I was already seated when she boarded the plane.  I began to have an internal panic moment as she made her way down the aisle towards me.

Please don't be my seat partner.  Please don't be my seat partner.

Lucky for me, she stopped one seat short.  This meant I could hear her loud music and conversation without having any of her bags fall in my lap.

I got lost in my book and was only snapped back to reality when I heard the word "publisher."  For the next few minutes I eavesdropped.  She was in the process of publishing a book.  No, she wasn't the child photographed on the cover.  That would have cost more.  She trusts her publisher and isn't so worried about what to write any more.

At that moment, I wished I could have traded seats with her seat partner.  I wanted to ask Disheveled about her publishing experiences.  How she find a publisher, did she have an agent, what was her book about, where would it be sold, was she exploring online publishing?  I had a million questions and not the opportunity to ask them.  Quite possibly because I'd been praying for her to be seated somewhere else.

Shame on me.  I judged before I knew.
Oops.

<>< Katie

Friday, May 21, 2010

An Afternoon at Starbucks

A few weeks ago I confided in you all that I have this secret goal to one day become a coffee shop-dwelling writer.  I talked about how my first shot at that goal didn't go so well since I chose a small, local coffee shop where professors hold office hours and my friends dwell.  I didn't give up, and on Wednesday I took a second stab at that goal.

"Hey, do you guys know of any good coffee shops in the area?" I asked after an enlightening, entertaining lunch discussing world politics and the best way to remove snot from one's nose (yes, really).

"Come over to church and use our coffee shop; that's why we have it," Bob suggested.  Then he laughed, "No, you wouldn't get any work done; you'd just talk."  I pretended to be mad at him, but we both knew it was the truth.

"Barnes and Noble has a coffee shop.  As does Borders," Jessica provided.  No good.  I'd spend more than the $3 I had in my wallet.

"Or there's a Starbucks across the street," Emily offered.

I was looking for a small, local coffee shop, but Starbucks would have to do.  I ventured across the street, walked into Starbucks with my purple purse, purple computer bag, and purple tumbler, and took a seat at the first table I saw with an outlet.  There I sat.  My water warm (it sat in the car during lunch).  My coffee cold (I only bought it so I didn't feel like I was loitering).  My battery dead (it was fine Monday, but by Tuesday it wouldn't hold a charge).  My pen sticky, my notebook out, and my inspiration missing.  I had been afraid of that.  I wasn't too worried.  I had plenty of stories to write.  Since the novel's hit a stand-still I've explored short stories.  As I've sure you've all noticed, I don't do "short" but, boy, do I love "stories."  If none of those would suffice, I had plenty of old material to play with.  I've never written "Major Parking Lot Incident" or I could tell the stories behind some of the weird items I'm finding as I clean my bedroom.  That wasn't necessary.  I did several hours of "picking" and POV focusing before finally calling it a day.

One thing I started in March was what I think I'm going to call the "inspiration box"  (Unless someone else has a more clever title). Anytime I read a good prompt, quote, exercise, or idea it goes in a gold box I saved from this past Christmas.  Most of these come from a writer's blog but some come from class and others from others.  I'd love to hear, how do you find inspiration?  What do you write when words don't come?  Also, can you work in a coffee shop or do you spend too much time people watching?  I've had that problem, too.

Oh, and how about a quick quote from Donald Miller's A Million Miles in a Thousand Years.

"And as I worked on the novel, as my character did what he wanted and ruined my story, it reminded me of life in certain ways.  I mean, as I sat there in my office feeling like God making my worlds, and as my characters fought to have their way, their senseless, selfish ways of nonstory, I could identify with them... I was also that character, fighting God and I could see God sitting at His computer, staring blankly at His screen as I asked Him to write in some money and some sex and some comfort." (Pg 85-86)

<>< Katie

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Significant First

It came today. The first of many, I’m sure. I might even accumulate enough to write an obscenity on the wall. Except while this was a surprise to me, it was not a surprise to God. He saw it coming. He let it come and during this hard week. He was sitting next to me when my first rejection letter made its way into my inbox. I realize I’m a writer. I realize I’m going to face a lot of these in my life. There’s no way to avoid them except by not sharing. That’s what hurts the most. I was confident with this one. Yes, apparently over confident. The people that rejected these pieces are the same people that keep urging me to share. Here I have and it’s shot down. Reject my work. That’s fine. I can’t win them all. However, please tell me why. What makes my pieces different from the other pieces that made it? I’m not saying my piece was perfect. There is no such thing as a perfect piece; I want to know where I can improve. I won’t take it personally. I won’t give them evil stares across the classroom tomorrow, but that doesn’t stop the waterfall that’s running down my face.

Rejection letter = upset = tears = runny nose = blow nose = (fear of) bloody nose

It’s been a long time since I’ve taken math but Chris tells me that means I could just say:

rejection letter = bloody nose.

Translation? Rejection letters punch me in the face.

The next step is my decision. Am I going to punch someone else in the face or am I going to move on? Am I going to let the pen dry out, pick a new major, and find a new career goal or am I going to accept this and realize it’ll happen again but some day it’ll change? Am I going to stay here hiding in my bedroom, ignoring text messages or am I going to go out in the living room and laugh at the formerly-constipated, now-possessed plastic mooing love cow? The choice is mine.

I did venture out.  I opted against going to my writers' group where I could wallow in pity with other rejects, if there were any.  Instead, I went to sign choir and kicked tables.  A classroom magically turns into a practice studio on Wednesday nights and that means all of the tables and chairs need to be collapsed and disposed of into the closet.    It's incredibly theraputic to kick in the hinges of class tables.

I tried to laugh and brush off the sasses but they hurt more than they do on an average day.  Especially the, "Katie, are you even literate?" when I misread the Wii directions.  It was a joke on my direction-following ability not my writing.

I remembered it's not Lent anymore, so I took my own cliche advice and wrote about it.  I guess the events of Wednesday weren't better than Tuesday.  In fact, the tears flowed instead of just threatening to do so, but my mood over all was better.  Even just a little.  I really appreciate your prayers today, and I could use a double dose tomorrow, please.

What really helped was Andy willingly playing "For the Moments I Feel Faint" by Relient K.  If you don't want to take a second to listen to the song, at least read the lyrics and sing them back to me when I forget them.

Am I at the point of no improvement?
What of the death I still dwell in?
I try to excel, but I feel no movement.
Can I be free of this unreleasable sin?

[Chorus:]
Never underestimate my Jesus.
You're telling me that there's no hope.
I'm telling you you're wrong.
Never underestimate my Jesus
When the world around you crumbles
He will be strong, He will be strong

I throw up my hands
"Oh, the impossibilities"
Frustrated and tired
Where do I go from here?
Now I'm searching for the confidence I've lost so willingly
Overcoming these obstacles is overcoming my fear

[Chorus]

I think I can't, I think I can't
But I think You can, I think You can
I think I can't, I think I can't
But I think You can, I think You can

Gather my insufficiencies and
place them in Your hands, place them in Your hands, place them in Your hands

Much love,
<>< Katie

Friday, April 16, 2010

The Pledge

I was already wearing khaki pants when I pulled on the gray polo with my alma mater's name embroidered on it.  I grabbed the navy blue polar fleece pull-over just in case the temperature dropped.  As I was walking out the door, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and couldn't help but laugh.  For years I complained about wearing a uniform to school every day and now here I am, years later, putting it on by choice.  At least it wasn't Friday.  It must be the private school advantage: we know how to dress ourselves in red, white, and blue.

Just for kicks and giggles, I contemplated writing the Honor Code on the top of my test.  "I pledge I will not lie, cheat, or steal.  Nor will I tolerate those who do."  For nine long years "I pledge..." was written at the top of every test I took accompanied by my signature that sometimes included all of the letters to my name.

Now, here I am, years removed from the pledge, the uniform, and the salmon colored bricks, yet they are forcing their way back into my life one collared polo at a time.  Some habits die hard, I guess.  However, it dawned on me today that it's all a lie.  I cheat.  I steal.  I tolerate it from myself and from others.

I am a writer.

I stretch the truth or make it up completely, I steal material from every day conversations, and I tolerate this only because I am a writer; this is what I'm paid to do.  Lying, cheating, and stealing are encouraged.

Eves drop.  Put something in your purse that doesn't exactly belong there (as long as it's only words, Grandma!). Let the tales of others appear in your work.  Don't feel bad about it.  After all, "The Code's more like guidelines than actual rules."

Ok, maybe that's a bit of hyperbole.  That doesn't mean real life is off-limits.  For example, a green laser was repeatedly shot across campus and directly into my eyes apartment this evening.  It gave me a nice headache.  When I write about this, the owner of the green laser pointer will be strangled and his laser buried at the bottom of the lake.  Just sayin'.

Lie, cheat, and steal material in the name of fiction.  Ok, I promise I won't do it while wearing the plaid skirt that makes me look like a Catholic school girl.

<>< Katie

Saturday, February 27, 2010

Coffee Shop

I have a secret. One I've never shared before.

Some day I want to be a coffee shop dwelling writer. I haven't decided yet if I want to be the sketchy person perched in the corner silently observing or the social butterfly who hops tables from the time the coffee shop opens until it closes. I don't know but I'm willing to set aside my dislike for coffee and hatred for the lingering coffee shop smell to achieve this goal.

The long process towards reaching this goal began on Wednesday. I had a nice chunk of free time in the afternoon. My plan was to do go right after lunch, do homework until my meeting at 3:30, finish the meeting quickly, and then write for fun until dinner.

Around 1:45 I walked in to the coffee shop and ordered my favorite drink: a decaf peppermint mocha. Lucky for me, my punch card was full so I got a free venti! Normally I order a tall, so I figured the venti would last me until dinner. It didn't but that's ok. See! I'm on my way to being a coffee drinker!

I found an open table and for the next hour or so I worked relatively diligently. Of course, I did take a break from preparing for my poetry workshop to enjoy some people watching or have a short chat but nothing too substantial.

That is until Jessica found me. I knew I was in trouble when she pulled out the chair and sat down across the table from me. By this point it was about 2:30 and my homework wasn't done yet. She had a coffee date at 3, so I didn't panic. I could still use that last half hour to finish my work and then write for fun (not blog) afterwards.

At exactly 3:00 the bell on the door to the coffee shop rang and in walked Dr. Zirci. It was actually ironic because Jessica and I had just been talking about his wonderful family.

"You're in my office," he teased me.

"Actually, I'm in the coffee shop," I teased back.

"That's my table," he argued.

"I don't see your name on it," I countered.

"This exact table is my office from 3-5 on Wednesday afternoons," he said pulling out a syllabus to show me he does indeed have coffee shop office hours at that time. What a fun professor!

Before he could kick me out of his office I invited him to join me. The three of us engaged in conversation until Jessica's coffee date arrived and I changed tables for my meeting. We left Dr. Zirci alone in his office.

At 4:15ish I returned to my seat next to Dr. Zirci ready to write.

"What are Katie and Dr. Zirci doing?" I heard a voice behind us.

"I don't know. Maybe she needs remedial help," a second voice answered.

"She's definitely not in Anatomy and Physiology; she's an English major. Plus, they're laughing. I'm pretty sure A&P isn't that funny."

"You're just jealous," I wanted to say but I didn't. Instead, I stole a glance at the time on his computer: 5:00. We'd been talking for a solid forty-five minutes; forty-five minutes of my precious writing time had dwindled away. Have you ever tried to write for fun in a coffee shop sitting side by side with a professor who's also your adoptive father? Let me tell you, it doesn't work very well. However, I don't regret it. Instead of writing, I spent forty-five minutes watching YouTube videos, looking at photos, and sharing life.

Sure, my story's not any further along but the time was well-spent.

Be real-life social today. Don't wait for people to join you in the caf because sooner or later dinner will be over and your conversation will wrap up (unless you're David). Don't wait to see wh appears in your apartment because it's only a matter of time before you'll disappear into your bedroom to do homework. Intentionally place yourself somewhere where you will interact with others and do nothing but fellowship. Put aside your plans to share life. Oh, and facebook/ blogger doesn't count, sorry. :-)

<>< Katie

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Part II: The Writer's Notebook

This is Part II of the "Katie's a Nerd" blog series. See Part I here.

"Why do you have a Day Book?" Roxy asked me yesterday as I tried to scribble down a few more notes for my blog prior to the start class.

"I'm a writer," I told her. I could tell from the confused look on her face that my answer was not satisfactory. From her terminology, I also knew which professor she had for her English general requirement classes therefore had a place to start with the explanation that would consume my remaining writing time.

A Day Book is a catch-all often used for classes. It includes homework, class exercises, free writing, notes, thoughts, ideas, and often handouts (thank you, glue stick). A Writer's Notebook is basically the same thing with a more intimidating name, less focus on classwork, and a little bit less glue. It's really easy to separate our English students by concentration and favorite professor based on the term used for the notebook clutched to their chest.

I wasn't a Writer's Notebook/ Day Book girl. The term didn't intimidate me, the lack of organization did. I love the organization of having separate places for different things and had a system. One binder for class, the PowerPoint for quotes, Word for story thoughts, the blog for God moments, and a small journal for the day's events. The thoughts of having all of those things combined together in one composition book concerned me. Imagine the mess! Then I glanced around my room and noticed the plethora of post-it notes strewn everywhere and decided something needed to change.

Enter my Writer's Notebook. I gave in and bought a composition book only because I finally found some that were college ruled! (Thanks, Office Depot). It lives in my back pack and is almost always with me. Whether I reach for it over a loose leaf sheet of paper is something I'm still working on, but I am improving. It is also the first thing I pack when I'm traveling. The first drafts of many of these blogs are hidden within its pages sitting side-by-side with thoughts that have yet to make an appearance in blog-world. It also contains great quotes and conversations, rough scenes from my novel, and sometimes my rants that cannot stay contained inside of me. For organization, I've tried to color-code my writing in pencil, black pen, and purple pen, but sometimes I forget which color means what. Sure, I still have a post-its everywhere, but I'm learning to enjoy the chaos of my Writer's Notebook.

This also leads to bedlam when the Writer's Notebook vanishes.

"OH MY GOSH!! I lost my Day Book," Keith ran into the caf screaming. Panic stuck. I guess he even sent text messages telling people to pray for him because it was like part of his life and been ripped from him.

"It'd be like if someone stole our blogs!" He said hitting me in the arm trying to put this catastrophe in perspective for me. I already understood, but there was no cutting him off. "Can you imagine if someone stole our blogs!"

"Katie's life would be over," Nikki teased. Maybe I'll hide her Writer's Notebook for a few hours and see how she likes it!

If you don't have a Writer's Notebook/ Day Book, get one. (And don't lose it, Keith). It doesn't have to be a college-ruled composition book. It can be a 10cent notebook Wal-mart sells right before school starts but know your spine will probably get messed up. It can be a fancy leather-bound book that's soft to the fingers but know those get expensive after one or two. Adapt these ideas (that I've already adapted once) and find something that works for you. But get a Writer's Notebook. Non-writers, I won't laugh (too hard) at you if you call yours a "Day Book."

Oh, and don't use a blog to catch your thoughts. I know, I'm writing to myself here. The chances of me accidentally destroying my blog is greater than losing my Writer's Notebook. I eat computers. Paper doesn't taste as good.

Remember those stories we talked about yesterday? Go break in your Writer's Notebook with some of them. :-)

Have you found Writers' Notebooks/ Day Books work for you? Are they practical for your life? Please let me know!

<>< Katie
PS: Happy birthday, Emily. :-)

Monday, February 15, 2010

Part I: Story Telling

This is Part I of a two-part blog series. Part II will be posted tomorrow.

"How many of you like to tell stories?" A professor asked one morning. Every hand in the room shot up. Of course, this is a creative writing class.

"How many of you like to hear stories?" Again, every hand went up.

"How many of you like to hear your parents or grandparents tell stories?" A bit hesitantly, the hands raised themselves into the air.

"Only the first time," Chelsea whispered to me. A little bit of laughter erupted from our side of the classroom. She'd voiced my exact thoughts. Only once do I really need to hear about how you walked to school everyday through the snow. Yes, I realize it was up-hill both ways.

However, there are some stories I don't mind hearing over and over again. Toddler Dad being brought home by the school girls because he had lost his clothes somewhere in the neighborhood (I like to think this was a recurring story and therefore truly happened as often as Dad tells it). Or how Mom's boyfriend took a flip off of the roof into a snowbank and a passer-by thought it was Grandpa.

I am blessed to have four grandparents and two parents, all healthy. Unfortunately, they're 900 miles away not telling me stories as we sit around and chat. Sometimes I miss that. Somedays I miss dinner being interrupted by a "Hey, did I ever tell you about the time our family cow followed me to school?" Yes, you have, only every day since I was old enough to remember but please tell it again!

As a writer, you never know when these stories are going to come in handy. Maybe they're the substance you need for a good poem, a great situation to plug into your novel, an amusing blog post, or even something to write about when you're suffering from writer's block. Recording and rewriting these stories in your Writer's Notebook is an excellent exercise.

What's a Writer's Notebook? That's tomorrow. See you then!

Go write about your family's classics,
<>< Katie