Wacky Wednesday

David: Katie, I especially like the Wacky Wednesday quotes when Nikki's mocking you because they're so funny!

Heather: Evan, get a canoe and row home.
Evan: I would love that but I think it's uphill.
Katie: It wouldn't matter; you'd be in a canoe!

Katie: It's "Yo quiero verTe."
Neal: Yeah, V-E-R-D-E.
Katie: No, V-E-R-T-E.  It's "I want to see You" not "I want green."

Andy: What is this?  Do I look like a maid? Or a butler?
Amy: The first one.
Nikki: Maid.

Caitlin: You exchanged hats!  That's like a promise.
Michael: Yeah!  It's a promise ring for gangsters.

Katie: Is that the Beast from Beauty and the Beast on your shirt?

Professor: James, do you know your Bible well?
James: No.
Professor: That's because you didn't grow up Lutheran.

Jennifer: Elizabeth, I can feel your heart beat through my butt!

Manolo: Say, "Esta es mi primera vez en Nicaragua."
Neal: Esta es mi primera vez en Nicaragua.
Katie: Neal!  Stop swearing at us!
Neal: What?
Katie: He's teaching you naughty words!
Neal: Nah!  This is a man of the Lord!
[an hour later Manolo did intentionally teach Neal the wrong word]

Nikki: I made a phalic image in this poem and he totally caught it!
Katie: He's a boy.  I'm not surprised.
Nikki: No, it was a Biblical image!
Katie: He's a boy and a div school student.

Sara: Katie's always brave and tries the mystery salad from the stir fry line.
[That's really just in here for Mom]

[I'm cutting cookie cake with a butter knife.  Andy handed me the machete we use to cut watermelon]
Katie: Will you make the bleeding stop when I cut myself with this knife?
Andy: Yes, but only this once.
Katie: Do you want some cookie cake without any blood on it?
Andy: No, I want blood on mine.
Katie: Well, I'll supply the cookie cake. You'll have to supply the blood.

Boy: I thought it was a fart.  But then it rolled down my leg.
Mother: And onto the carpet.
Brother: Yeah, I'll put that on my facebook: my brother pooped on the carpet.
Mother: No.
Boy: Please, Mom?

Ted: Uno, dos, tros.

Mo: Oh, did you see?  The directions are in plastic, too.
Jessica: You can't read plastic?
Mo: I mean, English.

Nikki: Do you like your sandwich cut?
Amy: Yes, like animals.
Nikki: You're going to get triangles.  Four of them.  Actually, I changed my mind and cut your P, B, and J like a pizza.

Erica: Where's Sherry from?  America?  I thought she was from Australia.

Sara: Are you stretching or giving me a hug?
David: Yes.

Heather: God is so good amidst all this crap.
Katie: She just said a naughty word in the prayer room!
Anonymous Friend: Hell, yeah!

Katie: Nikki!  You always walk away when I'm talking!
Nikki: I know that your stories are long enough that I can walk away and come back to hear the real point.

Amy: Ah!  I just got my phone charger stuck in the air conditioner vent.

James: I didn't do the assigment.
Professor: Well, that's what we expect from males.

Dad: I had a bad dream last night.  I was graduating college and I didn't have a job.
Katie: I'm so glad your nightmare is my reality.

Neal: If you don't perform your role, our body is not whole.  So don't let satan convince you that you're insignificant or something you did last week means you're not capable for being part of the body this week.  Without you, our joy is not complete and we can't enjoy this trip.  Maybe you're a pinky or maybe you're a heart; you're still part of the body.

Wacky Wednesday

Katie: Sometimes broken things are worth keeping.
Nikki: Like us.

Sara: I'm going to lick Cinderella's castle.
Heather: Or you could lick Mickey's butt.  Or you could lick the trash can Goofy touched.  Or you could lick the road where everyone walks.  Or you could lick David's face.  Do all of these sound ridiculous?  So does licking Cinderella's castle!

Katie: Go outside by the puke.
Andy: You want us to buy you some puke?  That's a waste of money.  We could just produce it naturally for you.
Katie: If I ever need any puke, you'll be the first person that I call.
[Elizabeth and Andy kiss loudly]
Katie: I have my own naturally-produced puke now.  Thank you.

Elizabeth: Jennifer!  Do not chip clip your eyelashes!

Nikki: Katie, I'm pretty sure you're one-fourth dog.  I'm going to get a dog whistle just to annoy you because I'm sure you'll hear it.

Katie: Dork.
Jennifer: I'm not a dork.
Katie: "Dork" is a term of endearment just like sassing is a love language.
Jennifer: A dorking is a pigeon with five toes.
Katie: I've also heard a dude is an infected hair on an elephant's butt, but I don't believe that either.
Jennifer: [laughing hysterically] Allyson!  Come here, dude!
[She proceeded to call everyone a dude and laughed all night]

Andy [making lunch for our student teachers]: Do you want ketchup or grape jelly?
Amy: A mix of both.
Andy: Don't tempt me.
Amy: Andy, I like my sandwich cut in the same of animals.
Elizabeth: I like mine cut like monuments.
Andy: Amy, yours are cut like quadrilaterals.

Jennifer: I wish I could buy an eraser just to erase things.

Eva: She's high maintenance.
Evan: That's my fiance she's talking about.
Katie: Are you going to let her talk that way about your fiance?
Evan [with pride]: I like maintaining her.

Katie: I'm studying English, Spanish, and American Sign Language.  This summer I'm going to China.
Josh: You realize none of those languages are going to help you in China, right?

Hannah: What's Katie's last name?  Axelson or Axelton?
Matthew: Have you seen Katie?!  It's not AxelTON.

Jennifer: I could be like a hamster and stick the candy in my cheeks, take it up to my tower, and eat it there!

Grandma: Yeah, we had burnt carrots--
Grandpa: --We had burnt carrots, burnt broccoli, and burnt offerings...

Jennifer: Katie, if I finished your sentences they'd start with words and end with numbers.

Danielle: I don't know how to wrestle Katie.  I'm afraid I'm going to break her in half!
Katie: I told you, she could lift me with two fingers: it's not a fair fight.
[Later I was wrapped around her body and she was standing and spinning]
Jo: Oh!  Don't hurt her head!
Katie: But it's ok to hurt the rest of me?

Nikki: Sometimes I just really don't think it's fair that I  am so blessed with so many of you wonderful girls in my life when there are lonely people in this world. [beat] Maybe I should start pawning you off to lonely people. [beat] Katie, you're first!

Katie: The sauce-dressing stuff on this salad is so thick and overpowering that I can't tell what's chicken and what's a crouton.
Josh: I feel like that may be the point.

Jennifer: BRRRR!
Nikki: I'm sobrrrr!
Katie: I'm not.

Nikki: Andy, the word "sloughing" is in this book.  And I used it today.
Andy: In a periodical sense?

[In the coffee shop, Amber's giving the attention wave to her computer.  She was watching a video.  Entire conversation in ASL]
Katie: Are you talking to yourself?
Amber: No, I'm in class, and I'm copying the teacher.
Katie: Why?
Amber: Because it's fun.
Katie: So you are talking to yourself.  Or you're four.  Which?
Amber: That one! [the four]

Katie: Ladies, you crack me up!
Jennifer: Oh, do you need some glue?

Dr. D: I never sneeze in dark rooms.

Jennifer and Allyson: Do you need anything from the store or the bank or the coffee shop?
Katie: I mean, if the bank is giving out free samples, I'll take some.

Lauren: Oh, man!  This scratch paper she gave us is so big and antique-looking.  It intimidated me.  I had to get a piece of scratch paper for my scratch paper.

Jennifer: I don't want to go to dinner.  I forfeit dinner.

[Andy was studying.  I was reading with my head in Amy's lap; Amy was studying]
Andy: Katie, you have a laceration on the occipital portion of your head.
Katie: Amy, I'm sorry I'm bleeding to death in your lap.
Amy [pulling away]: WHAT?!

Jennifer [singing]: Holy, holy, holy!
Katie [spoken]: Can I finish my story?  Lord God Almighty.

Dr. H [female]: This is my stun gun. POW!
Matthew: Don't taze me, bro!

Jonathan Martin: When the Spirit is working, there is a strange cocktail of supernatural boldness and awareness of my fragility.  It's like His calling card.

Wacky Wednesday

Allyson: I had to put studs in my ears because my right ear was growing up.
Jennifer: Really?  Getting more mature, too?
Katie: Is it going to graduate high school?

Andy: Katie, go home.
Katie: I am home.  You can leave.

Nikki: The way Katie plays with hair stresses me out.

Nikki: NO PDA!
Elizabeth: That wasn't PDA!  He blew a raspberry on my cheek!  There's no affection!

Katie: Nikki, I find it really easy to appreciate you when I don't see you.

Katie [voice]: Andy, if you're in the bathroom for more than five minutes, I'm calling 911.
[Five minutes later]
Katie [text]: It's been five minutes.  I'm calling 911.
Andy [text]: I am 911!
Katie [voice]: ANDY!
Andy [voice... from the bathroom]: What?
Katie: This boy's been in my bathroom for more than five minutes.

Katie: You guys can come to my wedding, but it won't be dry.
Jennifer: Then I'm bringing a poncho.

Matt: Missions is praying, giving, and going.  If you're not a missionary, you're a mission field.

Nikki: Half the things they talk about in that song we don't do on campus. ["Cheats" by Carrie Underwood]
Katie: Break into cars.  Slash tires.
Andy: Listen to country music.

Amber: Is it weird that I don't like being complemented on my interpreting because I don't want to interpret?
Katie: No.  It's like me being complemented on my poetry.

Elizabeth: Katie, while you're just standing there, would you make some chocolate chip cookies please? [We don't have an oven]

Elizabeth: Why can't we just defrost the dough in the oven?
Nikki: Because the oven is not a defroster.
Elizabeth: Then put them in the microwave.
Amy: This IS college!  I'll call my mom.  Mom, this is an emergency!  Do we have to thaw the cookie dough before we make them?  The directions say to thaw completely but we want cookies NOW!

Katie: I color my hair so I don't get confused for my sister.
Nikki: I never get confused for my sister.  Mostly because I'm twice her size.
Jennifer: Dye it--
Nikki: Diet?
Jennifer: --red.

Allyson: Guys, it sounds and feels like there's a thunderstorm in my stomach.
Jennifer: Oooh!  I want to hear it!
Katie: Is there lightning too?

Nikki: Katie, I don't understand you sometimes.  I wish I were you sometimes.

Church member: Where's your baby?
New Father: We took her back.
College student: Did you get your money back?
New Father: No, you always lose money on those kinds of things.

Nikki: I'd like to make an announcement: It's the day before Tuesday.  It's Monday.

Katie: What does it say?
Stephen: Avada Kedavra.
Sara: You just killed Katie Ax!
Katie: AHHH!  That's ok.  God gave me new life.

Katie: Better [dropping a computer] on a glass table than on my head.

Amy: Make origami.
Katie: I don't know how to make any origami that's pretty.
Jennifer: Like me.
Katie: If I knew origami, I would make a pretty you.  Or if I were your parents.
Jennifer, Amy: What did you say?
Katie: I said what you thought I said.
Amy: You said, 'your pants?'

Denaj: Jesus is a great editor.

Matt: God wouldn't expect you to do the impossible.

Katie: I'm donating blood tomorrow.
Andy: Are you going to let me start your IV?
Katie: Are you going to be there?
Andy: No.
Katie: Then no.
Andy: Do you have good veins?
Katie [rolling up my sleeve to look]: Yes?
Andy: I could hit them with a needle from across the room.  Yes!

Jennifer: I want to say something funny so you will write it in your nerdy notebook.
Nikki, Katie: That doesn't count.

David: Slim pickins.
Heather: Good thing God doesn't say that about us!

Rob: God will move mountains if we're willing to put in the shovel.

Jonathan Martin: If you ask for the fire of God to fall down, just be prepared because you never know what you're going to get.

Katie: ... yogurt out the wazoo.
Nikki: Ew!  I don't eat yogurt from the wazoo.
Jennifer: What's a wazoo?
Nikki: I think it's some secret anatomical place.
Katie: Ask Andy.
Jennifer: He would know: he's a wa who lives in a zoo.

Jonathan Martin: What have you done today without expecting anything in return?

Jennifer: Katie, you're lamo kablamo.  Put on your wrinkle shirt and lick a bone!

Katie: I'm going to go to my room.  People like me there.
Nikki: Katie, there's no one in there.
Katie: Your point?

Katie: It smells like campfire in here.
Elizabeth: Yeah, I'm straightening my hair.

Katie: Did you do anything fun today?
Andy: No, I didn't [because] I didn't work today.  BUT!  I did sign up for some EMS hours.

Nikki: Vulnerability and transparency.  They're yucky and they're good.  They're like vegetables.

By the way, I gave in and am now on Twitter (@KatieAx3), so you can follow our suite bantering in real-time and see quotes that inspire me throughout the day.

Happy Wednesday!  I pray no one is drowning in the Snowpocalypse.

<>< Katie

God is an Earthquake

God is an earthquake.

Sometimes He bursts in with trembling force destroying anything and everything.  With one simple movement He flips your life up-side down.  Just like detrimental earthquakes get all of the press, unexpected life changes get all of the attention.  Yes, God uses those.

He also uses earthquakes like the ones I experienced in Guatemala.

I was sitting on the bottom bunk journaling when the bed began to shake.  At first, I didn't think anything of it.  Heather must have woken up and kicked the unstable bed frame.  Then I looked at Heather, still fast asleep.  I looked across the room at Mandi who was looking back at me.  Her eyes held the same questions mine did: what is going on?

Together we both looked at the huge water jug.  The water sloshing told us it was not just a bed frame problem.  We were experiencing an earthquake.  So small it could have gone unnoticed.

Sometimes God's signs and His words are so small they may go unnoticed.  So subtle you might pass them by. 

I just wanted to take a moment and encourage you to seek in the big earthquakes; hear His booming voice.  But also realize that sometime God whispers.  Don't let the whisper, the little earthquake, pass you by.

With love,
<>< Katie

Él es grande

Well, I've finally finished scrapbooking Guatemala! Phew! That was job! Approximately sixty pages in a month (on top of Christmas and other bizarre family somethings :-)). Ok, minus the page with my roommates because it's going to take a lot of laughter to explain why Heather in the shower could hold hands with Caitlin in bed.

Today I was making a short list of things didn't make the cut and fit into the scrapbook.
- "Ok, let's see if my suitcase closes. I took out some socks, but I put in some chickens and a hammock." Oh, Heather. This can go on the Guate-mate page.
- "Él es grande."

When Neal was playing basketball with a Guatemalan woman she kept saying "Él es grande; él es grande." This literally translates to, "He is big; he is big."

When I wrote this I used a capital "É" since it's the beginning of a sentence but that made me stop and think.

"Él es grande."
What if we change the "Él" to mean God instead of Neal?

"Él es grande; Él es grande."
He's big; He's big.

God is big. Dios es grande.

Never forget that.

<>< Katie

PS. Spell-check doesn't like this post. Do you like it?

Let God Shine

After a great coffee talk with Laura, Chelsy, Heather, Christa, Annie, Morgan, Liz, Natalie, and Russell I made a pit-stop on the way into the caf. I then felt like Natalie because God spoke to me while I was in the bathroom. :-)

I was in the ladies' bathroom in the top of the caf building (side note: that bathroom is so awkward!) and I was looking at the granite counter top. I'm pretty sure they installed them backwards.

Most granite has certain fish-scale like sparkles that can be seen only on one side. Most people are oblivious to this fact. In fact, the installer and owner of the company that installed our granite had never heard of this before. Looking at the granite from one direction it looks normal. Beautiful, but nothing extraordinary. Going to the other side of our island, the granite pops! The flakes catch the light just right and it shines! (Sometime when you're at my house, ask me to show it to you because it's kind of hard to explain). When we installed our counters, we asked that the sparkle side be facing toward the dinette--or out so all of our guests could see it--instead of towards the kitchen--or in to where we could see it.

I was looking at the counter tops in the bathroom and God said,
"Katie, sometimes you're kind of like the backwards granite counter top. I'm always there just like the sparkles but I'm facing in. You've got your counter top turned around so you're keeping the sparkles to yourself. You don't let the world see see Me shine; you keep Me to yourself."

It made me think of Christina's favorite song growing up: "This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it... Hide it under a bushel? NO... I'm gonna let it shine... Don't let Satan blow it out... I'm gonna let is shine."

Are you letting your Sparkles shine or are you keeping them all to yourself?

In Christ,
<>< Katie

"For God, who said, 'Let light shine out of darkness,' made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ." 2 Corinthians 4:6